Home > Me, My Life > An Engineer’s Bride Search

An Engineer’s Bride Search

Oh, I am already 27, Ma God! and I am from this conservative Muslim society. I called my mother evening around 8’o clock. Tring! Tring!, phone rang. She picked the phone and fumbled a bit to locate the right button to turn it ON. She said, “Chupikre makaneee (local language, Sulficker son)”. Though my actual name is Sulficker, she could never pronounce it correctly, she always called me Chupikre at home. That is the easiest one she could pronounce since my childhood days and when I grown up I never tried to correct it. 

I am a 27 year old Engineer working in a MNC in Bangalore. I am from this small town called Palakkad around 50Km SW of Coimbatore. Coimbatore also known as “Kovai” is the second largest city in the state of Tamil Nadu and Tamil Nadu lies in the southernmost part of Indian Peninsula. My father was around 40years old when he got married. He lost himself in “religion” for few years before realizing “Ma God!, I too belong to Muslim society. Normally most of the girls/women from my society (I classify female under 18 as girls here though it’s not applicable in my society) got married from around 16 to 22 years in this part of country. So my father when he searched for a bridegroom, as he was too old, he could only get my mom. She was 18 years (18 or 16, I can’t tell exact, she didn’t know her date of birth) old when she got married. 

My mother started speaking over phone. This “brokkerre (her way of saying broker)”, Abdul Khadhirre visited our house today. She has her own way of pronouncing every name. I started listening quietly. She asked “you there? I said, yes I am listening, tell me. Recently she has some ear problem and not able to hear things properly. She rushed to a neighbor and took help to put the phone in loudspeaker mode. She asked again “you there”. I said yes, yes, tell me! She could hear more clearly with phone in loudspeaker, she continued. He came to our house with two proposals, one B-Teche, one M-Sshee (M.Sc). She raised a question, what is this M-Ssheee, Is it better than B-Techee? I didn’t know how to reply that question, instead I asked which area, what is bride’s name, which place they belong to etc. She replied, one girl is from Manjalloor, and other from Coimbatorre. She didn’t know the other details. 

My mother knows that she could educate her son well, though she is illiterate. She is adamant that the bride should be well educated and from good family. She didn’t know any other details, not even bride’s name. I came next day to office, requested my Manager for one day off. I told him, I am going to see a bride and her name is “W”, she has done her B-tech from Coimbatore engineering college (I added few data other than what I heard from my mom). Manager wished me and approved the leave application. 

We took a car to go to Coimbatore. My mother said on the way that brokerre informed her they will be giving “200 pavan” (each pavan ~8grams) of gold, a car and 2 lakh rupees as dowry. I asked myself “free gifts, Buy 1, get 3”? Since my mother led a poor life through out her childhood I never tried to talk against her though I am against dowry. I said you talk about dowry some other day; now let me talk to bride. I was given 10 minute time to talk to bride. Being first time I had no idea how to read a persons mind in 10minutes. We reached brides house, and I was taken to a separate room. A white girl is sitting in a corner, wearing a black Bhurkha with golden embroiding in it. I sat across her, and asked her name. She said “Salma”. I tried to test her education and started asking questions in English in a pleasant manner. Salma replied with a lovely smile. She got a dimple in her cheek and this white face in the backdrop of her black Bhurkha with golden embroidery work. I looked at her face for few seconds. She is a bit fat and chubby; she said recently she put on weight (since Muslim bridegroom always liked fat girls, brides are fed well when they come to age). I asked about her education, her hobbies, her likes, dislikes, etc. A voice called me from back at 9th minute of our conversation, Chupikree, Are you done? I said, hmm Ah, huh, yeah done!

Categories: Me, My Life
  1. R!P
    October 18, 2009 at 5:48 pm

    Brilliant description .. I knew you had it in you .. !! I didnot know about Salma btw … how did it go ??

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